Wednesday, February 27, 2013

I had the dream again last night. It FINALLY made sense. I have had this recurring dream my entire life. It's not so much a nightmare; it's not so much my fantasy. I'm living on the coast somewhere in a house that's built on stilts. My bedroom overlooks the sea. I am watching a storm form. It blows in and shakes the house. It drenches and blows and sends sheets of rain! I can feel the house creak and groan under it's power! Dark skies looming...thunder booming! And in the morning, the sun comes up. It breaks through the window and draws me to the water's edge. The driftwood and sea grass tangle there and I can feel their textures squishing and scratching my feet. The quiet sound of low tide laps at my legs, and I feel truly refreshed and clean. Even the air feels cleaned by the storm. I revel in the sea mist and breathe it! Consume it! It compels my nakedness, and drives a primal urge. I am complete and alone.

So you see, my nightmare of lonely is filled by my drive for this. I am filled and so I have no room for emptiness. I will shine like the sun on the Caribbean morning.

I have another recurring dream, about a pig with a man's chest...or about a man with a pig's head...that's a blog for a day of fog. (Note to self.)

I finally caught an episode of House Hunters International filmed in Belize. I guess it explained to me why some people I have encountered are a little snarky. The couple was relocating with 4 small children from South Carolina. The husband had sold his construction business and planned to get into real estate once he settled in Belize. The wife was...well...not me. I understand a little more why the post about my education background was met with skepticism. This couple had 4 elementary school children, and never visited a school while house hunting. Maybe they had a plan similar to mine, and would cyber school or home school the kids. As for the husband "getting into real estate"...I have been looking at properties via the Internet, and I end up finding the same listings after a while. There are only so many properties in Belize. Why would someone list with a guy who lives in a gated community and does NOT live like any Belizean ever has? I realize that the properties I see on the Internet are only a fraction of those available. (That's why we haven't sunk our savings in a home. We figure once we are on the ground and making friends, we'll find out dream property.) I just think the market may be saturated with EXPERIENCED real estate agents. Maybe this guy thinks he can sell overbuilt American style homes for an inflated commission. I guess I hope that it works out for them, I surely don't want to be a nay sayer. I think, however, that if I found the home they settled on, I could knock on the door and it would be empty. I think that they might be a perfect example of what Belizeans have come to expect from expat Americans.

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